I was in that place this past Wednesday. The topic was forgiveness. I settled back in my pew ready to relax, more
than to receive.
Scripture verses popped up on the screen. Over the course of the past nearly 18 years
of being a Christian, I have read them countless times.
Yes, I know I am
supposed to forgive. And I know it
should be more than the seven times that Peter boasted about.
The thought crossed my mind, “I am beyond
seventy-times-seven.” This honestly
wasn’t a prideful thought but more of a frustrated feeling. I couldn’t help but wonder if there wasn’t
some kind of cap on forgiveness. I mean,
isn’t there eventually a point you reach in which the limit has been hit?
Then the topic of resentment came up. I started to feel a little unsettled in my
heart. But then I almost breathed a sigh
of relief when it was mentioned how those who are resentful are looking for
payback.
Whew…that isn’t me. I
definitely don’t want something bad to happen to this person I feel like I am
constantly forgiving. I love this person.
It was nearing the end and I guess I was sort of feeling like
I was home free. But then it
happened…God spoke something very specific to me. It wasn’t a Bible verse that had been
shared. It wasn’t a personal story that
impacted me. It wasn’t even the usual
teaching you receive about forgiveness (you know, how it doesn’t mean you are
excusing that person’s behavior, etc.).
This was something that was specific and unique to my situation. You wouldn’t find a reference to it in the
Bible. No one else would ever guess what
was laid on my heart.
But here is the point.
If I had not been sitting there, hearing a teaching on something I’ve
“heard a million other times,” I would have missed out. It made me wonder how many other moments have
been lost because I wasn’t there to
receive it, either physically or otherwise.
How many times have I tuned out when God had something
specific for me? Perhaps it is those
moments in which we are ready to stuff some cotton into our ears that God might
have the most to say.
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