Isn’t life as a believer such an incredible journey? I mean, you truly never know what to expect. Things can change in a heartbeat. I don’t know how anyone could ever say that being a Christian is boring. Living a life that is being guided by the Creator of the Universe is anything but.
In fact, there have been times when I have desired boredom in my life. I would ask God,
“Can’t things just be normal?” I would desire to have moments where nothing is really going on, life is just sailing along. This hardly seems to happen, though. But that’s okay. You see I have also found that when things are sailing along, my connection to the Lord decreases. I really don’t have a need for him if everything is hunky dory.
There is a specific part of the journey that I think can be the most difficult—even more challenging than dealing with relationships, our careers, illnesses, or any other “outside” event. It is the journey that we take within.
You see, we are constantly being molded and shaped. He is the potter and we are the clay. He continues to do His work within us. It isn’t always easy to be on that wheel. Sometimes we look like nothing more than a mess. Other times we begin to take on the form of something quite beautiful.
Then there are times when we seem to be almost complete. As we are shaped into this beautiful creation, we are removed from the wheel and we think this is finally it. We are now everything He foresaw. He is ready to put the finishing touches on us and display us. But to our shock, instead He shatters us. He breaks us apart and begins to start all over again.
What a minute! What is this? Why are you breaking me God? Have you been there and felt that way? While it might seem like cruel and unusual punishment God knows what He is doing. He knows the flaws that still need some work. He knows the cracks that need to be filled. He sees the discolorations. His work is not through.
Recently I felt just like that piece of pottery, suddenly shattered to the ground. He began to show me some things that I had no idea were even there. It’s almost easier to deal with those things that you already know are an issue. But when He reveals something that you didn’t even realize existed, it can be difficult to receive.
However this journey was unlike any other because it was a combination not only of what He was doing within me but it also involved outside sources. There were things happening in relationships that I could not understand and was frankly, quite frustrated about. It seemed like too much. How could I possibly deal with all of this?
Then I came to the realization that I am at that place where He KNOWS I am ready. He wouldn’t be putting me through this if He didn’t think that I was ready. So that actually confirmed to me that He has more belief in me than I have in myself.